Ho Ho Ho!

A very merry Christmas to all of you out there! I love this day....quite a few reasons, one of it being gifts...sadly Santa seems to be forgetting me almost every year, but its always fun seeing kids' eyes glowing when they see themselves surrounded by gifts.

And there is something else special about this day. Its the only day when overweight guys (I plan on joining this group pretty soon) are really looked upon :) After all...Mr. Claus is hell overweight! And all of seem to be spoiling his diet by treating him with milk and cookies on X'mas eve......hmmm...think about it, with a population of over 1.5 billion, lets say around 40% of the same celebrate Xmas.....of which a generous 40% (most of us are lazy to bake those cookies in the first place, the rest would've finished it before our moms could leave some for our fat delivery boy :) ...ok ok sorry Santa...now i know why he's been forgetting me)....now with those numbers, its a lot of cookies...the guy must be gaining atleast 300kgs every Xmas eve! Poor him...uhm...wait I should be feeling sorry for his reindeers!

Speaking of giving, since I'm completely broke, I've decided to dedicate this blog to all my friends whom I had planned big gifts for but ended up being broke and couldn't even afford a 'Mentos' for them. This blog is dedicated to all my pals who made me who I am....will be mentioning a few names, but since I have too many complaints coming around about how long my posts are, I wouldn't be able to put all your names...sorry guys

First and foremost, let me start with my dearest gang in school....Akshath, Jameel, Jasim and Livin....the five of us were often call the Backside boys...no we weren't a band and we sucked at singing...but well there was another reason for the name. It all started with our Math sir in the 11th grade..the bugger couldn't speak english for peanuts! We guys prefered sitting at the back, you see its more comfortable sitting there and sleeping rather than smelling his mouth stuffed with 'paan' and suffocating to death! He hence called us Backside...we modified it a bit :)

uhm...small rewind, going back to my 9th and 10th, it was Mudassir, Abizar and Osama...something common here? Yep all four of us are muslims and we lived nearby...I was the only southie in the gang and maaan did I have a tough time learning Hindi (Mumbai-style)....rather learning how to speak the language...I still can't write well...hehe I studied the language for over six years and I still suck at it! The last Hindi exam I wrote, I passed with just 5 marks above the pass mark...and this was after a 11 hour phone conversation with another pal of mine Ajay (the guy was a brainiac!!!!) discussing every single mathra in the bloody classwork book...did it work? naaaaa...:) Muddi is out in Dubai trying to figure out why he is still studying when all of us are working and Abizar is in Pune trying to figure out which chemical would result in the next fuel revolution (he's a Chem Engineer)...as for Osama....if any of you know where this guy is, please do inform me....the last I heard was that he was walking around someplace in Mumbai looking like the local "Bhai"....hmmm...

Mumbai reminds me...Vicky...buddy how can I forget ya??? Vikas is a guy who is still a kid by heart....and he's got a stomach that seems to have no end. Doctors tried to figure things out by telling him he had a stone and operated on it...they're still baffled. The guy can stuff himself with two whole pizzas, 2 burgers and a 1 foot Subway sandwich and still have enough space in his stomach to eat dinner at home.....which usually is a lot of rice and a couple of curries. Yeah now you guys know where I got my eating habits from! The guy is a big fan of Manga cartoons...so if any of you have a bunch of Pokemon or similar cartoon tapes...let me know..

The blog would seriously be incomplete if I don't mention two gals who really left a mark in my life...Aparna and Zahabiya.......yep yep thaliya thaliya...and yes I was teased with both these gals in school....uhm...come to think of it I was teased with all gals in school....sigh...A2Z...now I remember :( alright let me get back to wat I was trying to write out here. Two real sweet gals, seriously! Zahabiya was the short tempered...wait...wat am i saying "was"...she is still the same short tempered idiot who keeps getting bugged about everything around her...esp me :) hehe I'm scared to meet her now actually, might end up getting my leg amputated or something....but I admire the gal a lot for the strength she had and got through some of the worst things in life :) as for Aparna...she's one of the sweetest gals I know...yep I know there are quite a few of her classmates who would beg to differ...but hey...she is!

Speaking of strong ppl...I can't forget Sushmita there....she's actually the strongest gal pal I've made in my life...and probably the most creative of the lot...she's out there planning her new Youth Mag for Chennai...the very best of luck to her!

So I've missed many pals but I better move onto college else I just won't finish this post! College got me a big sister (yep in addition to the three I already have)...her name's Sheetal...the gal has soo much energy in her, I'm sure it would be enough to power the whole of South India!!! She was more or less my mini mentor in college, esp during those lousy Jr-Sr ego clashes...Vicky is busy looting her off her salary at this very moment by hogging away a bunch of free dinners :) Sheetal...don't worry, I'll be there soon :)

My hostelmates....Vijay, Ajith, Aji, Aneesh, Bobby, Jom, Saras, Abhi, Fiyaz, Ameen, Jose, Sujith, Jobin, John, Mathai, Pattar, Sukesh, Thahsin, Shaheen, Tinku, Shamju, Anuraj, Geo, Sony, Costy, Naigil, Sanju and every1 else from the MH....thanks for bringing a smile on my face everyday and the billion kicks on my ass for my birthday!

My roomie for three years, Shameer....the guy has seriously great talent with his guitar...wonder if he'll make a good replacement for Santana.....hmmmmm...naaaa maybe not ;)

My projectmates...Basheer and Manoj...these guys are the best...Basheer for one taught us all to take life as cool as possible and Manoj...the guy can make any situation hilarious.....if he were writing this blog instead of me, I'm sure half you guys would end up having a high BP for the laughter induced!

Anu Jose Pala....the idiot whom I made my little sis...she's the gal who taught me how to talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk....and then realise that my bill has actually sky rocketed!!!

Jayarani...a gal who thinks of everything...let me explain, on our tour to Goa and Bangalore in the 3rd year, she carried everything except the kitchen sink....seriously! anything we needed, she had in one of her bags!

Deepak, Manu, Vivin, Silas, Sajan, Sneha, Bency and all the other juniors in the Training and Placement Cell of my college...it was teamwork in lieing to different companies about how great our college was.....it was only when I was out of college that I realised we weren't really lieing!!!

Alright so maybe she's not from my college, but Susan...a friend who has always managed to bring a smile on my face even at my worst days....yeah she doesn't realise this but everytime I call her to console her about her endless problems ;) (she's surely gonna kill me for this), she goes on laughing at every sentence I speak...yeah some call it madness...but I call it cute...and yeah...she's one of the only ppl who comment on my site every other week....(Sameera you're another one...shall include you in my next post for sure)....speaking of Susan...how can I forget dear ol' Anoop...the nutty idiot who does the craziest of things...as an example...this guy actually travelled from his college to his place in Trv around 4 hrs and then went back halfway and got back home all in a day's time (or was it two?)....watever and the reason was pretty funny...not getting into that, 'coz im sure he's already ready to beat me up!

And last but not the least...Tina...the sweetest gal I've met...she's celebrating her Birthday today, so lets all wish her a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! :)

So that's my Christmas gift for this year...hope all of you enjoyed it....

Merry Christmas once again!!!!!!!

PS: To all those whose names I haven't mentioned....am reeeeally sorry, but this post is getting waaaaay too long...sorreeeeee


Did you guys hear the latest? The ppl in fat chairs who call themselves politicians have finally decided to heed to the tears of the 6.5million people in Bangalore and are doing something about it....uhm...well i guess they took it a bit too literally when we asked for a change in Bangalore. They've decided to rename the city to Bengaluru....hmmm....sigh if only they had the brains of an ant to think straight! And what more? We've got a bunch of crazy journalists who have suddenly voiced their concern regarding the same, and that the government is making a mistake by doing so (to which i partially agree...not until i read the rest of the sentence) as this may lead to a confusion with the state 'Bengal' (trust me guys, i couldn't stop laughing reading that...I'm sure a bunch of my senior managers would have been staring at me when i did). Talk about the world going nuts! We've got a city who has barely 10m of tar remaining on all its roads (which theoretically comes to over 300-500kms in length) and yet all they can think of is a change in name to bring back the sentiments in Kannadigas...Man I'm glad Kannadigas ain't as insane as the bunch who rule the state....watch out kerala...you've got competition!

Now that you get an idea of how much i detest crazy politicians who seem to crap a lot about doing stuff let me get into another thought. Have any of you bought gifts for girls? Maaaan seriously complicated...its an absolute injustice giving us sooo much of choice....gals have it simple, all you need to do is get something that uses a battery or an AC adapter and we are absolutely happy, on the other hand with gals you've got a billion and one choices and you are bound to go wrong watever u get! (and this from a guy who has three sisters!!!) If only we could get into those heads for just a tiny second to figure out wat they would like and not frown thinking how cheap/boring/unimaginative/....and anything else that matches the criteria of loser about us.

Haven't really talked much about my company to you guys have I? Well its a fun place, you get good food for cheap, and Wipro has done a great job in improving the environment (no not just in terms of gals, but the campus is kewl). We've been having fun from the day we've joined, no pressure, no1 to boss us around, our managers are all smiles when they talk to us (and yes...quite often I've wondered if they are plotting against us while we think they are happy about us) and well........yep we're jobless! Atleast for a while...we are in what we call 'Free Pool'....

Its pretty simple, we come to work early morning at 8:30 and we are asked to report to the billiards room and play pool till 6 in the evening...:) alright so maybe we don't have a billiards room, its just what companies call 'Bench'. The transition period between training and being in a project....won't be long before I curse myself for having written this post coz of how busy I will get....sigh....being a Software 'Techie' (don't really know wat that means but it sounds kewl when Times of India keeps referring to us like so) can be a pain, but well it pays for my food, fuel, iPod, cellphone, etc. etc :) so can't really complain!

Taking off for now...CIAO

Bangalore's way of saying...you're dumb!

Ever heard of a place that sells you Reebok shoes for under 1000Rs? You do??? hehe address please :)

I really can't understand the concept of charging over 30% of the price for just a lousy logo which is bound to come off in a month's time anyways. Anyone from Nike or Reebok who could enlighten me on this? Ok so I guess all of you are busy trying to figure out what the @#%#$#@ is this bugger getting at? Is there a point...uhm...confession..nope :) Was out shopping yesterday, went out to Marathahalli...and for all those guys who haven't heard of it, its a part of town where you can get almost all branded products for half the price...why?? why you ask me? well these are factory seconds...and no that doesn't mean that the janitor in the textile factory used the clothes to wash the floors or something like that, it just means that there is a defect in the clothes which no1 would notice in the first place...uhm..yep an ant might, 'coz u see the bugger might just trip over the loose thread as he heads to his destination..with only his mission in mind...'bite shanim bite shanim'....ouch! alright I get the point, won't steal your bread crumbs anymore...happy? alright now that the guy has gone to reinforcements I shall continue...

Just realised I hadn't finished my earlier sentence....alright so basically we were there buying clothes and shoes and whatever food I could put in my tiny stomach (it ain't all that tiny actually) and at the end of it we decided to push off to MG Road...nope we had no plans of comparing prices and no we weren't there to tell every1 how brilliant we were to have purchased all those things for under 400Rs each...but well I need some eye exercise you see....Its funny how we always manage to enjoy the beauties of life when we are there....but its sad we wouldn't even bother speaking to a single one (to all those who have been confused till this point about heavenly bodies...nope im not talking about stars...talking about the fair sex :) ) 'coz somewhere deep within you feel they just might end up being a pain in the ass eventually. Come to think of it...most are...and yep half the world is out to get you broke...and the other half is already broke 'coz well...that half are us guys! A friend of mine was just telling me how she makes her guy recharge her cellphone and how she doesn't call him but makes him do so....hmmm...tragic situation i must say...but then again...hehe if I were the guy, I would do the same....maan we die for attention don't we????

Enough of that crap....the worst part of my day was just approaching...we had this long day and we decided to end it by one last hurdle...getting into a BMTC bus from the commissionarate bus stop (yes yes i got the spelling wrong and I have absolutely no plans of walking all the way there to correct myself!)...It was waaay past 9:30 and my last bus, which is the 9pm '141E' was long gone....speaking of which, BMTC has this lovely way of numbering their bus routes....they put numbers and this is followed by letters....and the source and destination of the bus will always (as a law set by a saddist who is laughing away somewhere in his guest house at this very moment) in kannada. The number seem nice and well organised, but there are over 26 routes on a single number...as an example, there is a bus route 201...suffixed by A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z,AA,AB.....etc etc and if you were dumb enough to get into the wrong bus, you wouldn't know until the bus driver suddenly took a turn off some traffic light from where it is absolutely impossible to get off...simply because the buggers in the bus just don't let you move! Mumbai Suburbans seem soooo much better...you ain't travelling blind there!

Alright so as I was saying...we were waiting at the bus stop and I had just realised that I was to take one of the million 201s....sigh I hated that bus! Why you ask me? Well for one, I almost lost my mobile in that bus and well its almost always crowded and most of the trailer type buses that run on that route barely move...I'm sure a snail walking behind these buses would be cursing the driver to move over so that he can overtake us....I had absolutely no choice but take the bus...lest I decided to walk which well...I wasn't in the mood to after walking around the whole of Marathahalli....stepped in and I was just too late to realise that I had forgotten to get some change and was stuck with just 100 buck notes. Yes all of you...not just those from India, but those abroad do know how irritating it can be for a conductor/driver when you give him a huge note and expect change for a ride that costs you a measely 5% of the note...oh well...I was faced with my tormentor now and presented the 100Rs note and spoke my destination as gentle as I could. He gave me a big smile and handed me my ticket after writing 95 on the back of it and just walked onto the next person. Now I was confused...was I just presented with a new currency which was used only by people living in the buses of Bangalore or was that just an autograph?? I bumped into him again and asked him for my change...."Change illa saar" and then there was a lot kannada which just passed by my brain as though they were directed to the person walking on the other side of the road....I rougly figured out that he would give me the change when I got off at my stop.

A little info to all those people reading this from countries in Europe and America...buses are pretty busy in India and when I mean busy, it doesn't just mean we have to stand and we don't get a seat to sit down, I also mean most of the people are either hanging on their arms outside the bus or defying every single law of gravity by actually hovering in air all thanks to the N number of people pushing them from behind. This was exactly how this bus was....I was stuck inside this bus and was just praying I would get home in one piece....sigh...I stood there wondering where all these guys were headed to late in the night at 10pm....guess they were wondering the same about me....my destination arrived and jumped off the bus and started walking as fast as I could away from the bus...trust me I had had enough!

Reached home and decided to lie down and watch a movie and that's when i put my hand in my pocket to find the ticket with the magic number '95'....oh CRAP!!!!! yep....i had lost 95 bucks :( I had spent 100 bucks for a lousy bus ride...the bloody ricks charge just 50 which again is pretty overprized as the ride is generally just 28!

Sigh...guess that's life and for one thing, I've learned my lesson....if a bus has the number 201 on it, I'm not stepping in again!!!


Yep...even i felt the earlier blog was crappy!!!!!! alright so basically it was like this...i was in a bad mood and needed something to cheer me up and well blogging didn't really help....a phone call did cure it though :D

So let me get started...firstly...a big thanks to Sameera for suggesting Chethan Bhagat's books to me....maaaaaan that guy is good!!! That guy actually got Shanim...yes Shanim of all ppl stuck to a book on a Sunday!!! I just couldn't put the book down although i had this huge test the very next day...aaah it was worth it...and luckily i did manage to do the test pretty ok...Speaking of the book...its a must read..ofcourse the making out scene reminded me of some lousy porn posts put up on sites...so don't get disappointed......modify the things there and suit it to your own thoughts...and guys..don't get carried away :)

Speaking of bangalore...I'm loving it!!!! and yes...the pretty heavenly bodies are just part of the reason...the rest of it...uhm...well its tons better than being at home in Trivandrum counting the droplets of sweat dripping off my forehead....alright so maybe that was a little gross...but that's wat usually happens when i stick in front of my pc for over 8 hrs at a stretch without the fan or ac working......

You won't believe this but when i typed or...i was wondering if the syntax was right...yep the IT fever has stuck on...and I've been doing a bit too much of SQL....that reminds me, guys I've been put up in the Oracle division of one of the depts of Wipro.....the name of it won't really matter...trust me...hehe it took us over 3 weeks to figure out wat exactly the dept was :) and I wouldn't want you guys..my poor readers to break their heads on it...no i don't underestimate you guys but...hey come on...its not worth it :) So guys..the next thing you know, you'll hear of a professional DBA named Shanim who has suddenly taken over operations of Oracle and brought the share price of the same to an all time low with over 40,000 databases crashin at a single instance....yep the day is not too far away!

Alright outta there and into another weird thing that happened in my life...yeah i know it should be called normal since its my life but then again...i need to emphasize na? alright...have you ever had a situation when you a call a friend and you get some1 else on the phone asking you wats your problem and why you called? Well yep...I've had this situation once when I was like...uhm...12 and now!!!!!!! For a moment I thought I was finally admist professionals and stuff...but hey the kids are still around...had a fun laugh after that situation :) reminded me of how we used to fight for girls and say things like "you keep off or we shall meet outside"....uhm...wait...that was a dialogue in one of our bare-shirts' movies.....fyi...Salman...oh well...kids :)

Hmmm.....can't think up anything more....food just arrived and i've lost all concentration :) that reminds me...been working out a lot...its more of being stingy...been walking like 10kms a day :) hate paying for a rick...so i prefer walking..yeah true it takes a lot of time and energy...but well i gotta burn the thousands of calories i put in every day don't i? hehe...been eating like I haven't seen food ever in my life...food's cheap in some places and I managed to find out exactly where those joints are...and I've been feeding myself crazy! Shall explain...we were getting free lunches during our training at an external location...on Fridays we get noodles, fried rice, some chinese dish, another fried dish (usually paneer or potato) and then a bunch of other goodies....I usuall have four servings on these days....two for the noodles and another two for the fried rice :) ....not to mention...deserts!! and guys the food is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alright...me quitting for now...till next time...Peace out!

Its been a long time....

Hey guys, yep I know...haven't been blogging for a while...uhm...a little too long if you ask me. But hey..wat am I to do...I spend most of my life in a vehicle getting back home now....yep I'm in Bangalore.

After a year long wait, I've finally joined Wipro and well the magic of being there has kinda dried off and life's just getting too busy and I'm getting a feeling that its really going nowhere. Its funny I was so keen on getting here and starting off and now all I do is wait for a weekend to get some sleep. Strange....this from an insomniac!! Alright quitting the boring serious talk and back to my own dearest self.

Lets start off with Bangalore...its a lovely place, beautiful ppl......uhm...let me be a little more specific...beautiful babes!!!!!! then moving on, superb weather...barring the two weeks after I joined when the Rain Gods were working overtime....yep the beautiful floods of Bangalore which shattered one of our offices down at Madivala (for all those of you who have no idea wat that is, its the name of a place...and no its not Mad I watever!!). And then we move onto the most talked about topic in Bangalore....the roads and the traffic.......uhm...let me explain, have you ever parked your car and sat inside it for 2 hours just looking at the boot of the car up front with a bunch of ppl honking at you for no reason watsoever and a rickshaw and a bike fighting it out just to pass through the square inch of a space between your car and the car beside you? Welcome to Hosur Road! Adding to injury...the roads are far from smooth, its more like going through a roller coaster with the cars having square wheels! Anyways I've moved off from Electronic City for a while...been pushed off to MG Road for training and uhm...nope its no better on this side of town either.

Oh crap....gotta cut this post short...shall get back to you guys soon with a lot more crap in a day or two...gotta run....

What was the Rickshaw guy thinking???

Ok so maybe it wasn't one of dearest rickshaw guy taking a wrong turn and ending up on top of a building...its a restaurant in Nottingham. Its called "4550 miles from Delhi". Quite a funny logo if you ask me!

A big hi from England

I know its been quite a while since I penned down a few words. And yes, I am not responsible....its just that I haven't been inspired to write something for a while....uhm...guess i was just bored...

Alright, now that I've started off on a lousy note :) lets get to the better part (if you wish to call it that) of the post. To all those who guessed that I would be suspected to be a terrorist at the Heathrow airport...three cheers to you...it did kinda happen! I was the only person who was stopped twice, frisked and my baggage was checked too.....strange, guess those doggies really liked the chocolates I'd got my little niece...they just wouldn't budge from my bags....crazy buggers....have a feeling they were plotting against me, had seen these two doggies giving me a strange look...talk about racists! hmph! anyways, the cops were better off...they made up for the rude attitude shown by their dogs (yes i was offended)...they were sweet and were pretty surprised to know that my niece loved story books in comparison to PSPs and other such electronic goods which leave a huge dent on your wallets....hehe infact they were asking me to help them convince their kids to start reading...suggested they speak to my sis :)

All those who wish to lose some weight, I would suggest you drop in at London without a valid visa, trust me guys...its a huge walk from the airplane to the passport control....guess the architect who designed the airport used to work for an animal testing lab and was a quite used to designing mazes for the mice used in the tests, coz i seriously felt like i was in one. I had seen the same point around 10 times and must've walked atleast a mile or two before i got to a rather rude lady from the home office who kept asking me why i was there....well duh! I was there to get my passport stamped so that i could go forward and collect my baggage...come on, is that so hard to understand??

Anyways, the weird experience I had with that female (mind you, she's an indian/pakistani born in britain) things kinda changed when I got down into london. My little niece ran up to me with a huge and tight hug. Reached my sister's town of Grantham a couple of hours later and trust me, I've been going crazy since! why you ask? These ppl here are just tooooooooooooooo polite!!!! There isn't a moment without a smile or a "thank you" uttered from their mouths.....and all you guys, trust me....this town has some of the best looking brits in the whole wide world! hehe I love going to the supermarket 'coz of that....all the helpers there are blondes, green/blue eyed, and have a lovely smile that keep you drooling away...and yep tongue twisted too...i got sooo bloody damn tongue twisted once i forgot wat i was gonna ask her!

Speaking of confusion, the roads out here are seriously confusing...oh no they aren't a bunch of criss crossed roads and no they aren't designed by the same dope who designed the airport...its just that they have sooooo many rules that keep you wondering why they hadn't started a PhD on the subject "Driving on British Roads"....trust me, even Issac Newton wouldn't get that degree....hmmm..guess that's why they never bothered having one! That reminds me, Grantham is the birth place of Issac Newton....went around looking for the apple tree which helped us realise that blunders can result in the discovery of gravity....but well was disappointed to find out that it was in Oxford and well....i guess its dead by now.....

alright back to the roads...think about this, there are rules on how to walk on the sidewalks too...infact they also tell pedestrains to wear something reflective at nights....and that's actually a law! The other day i was walking down the road, there wasn't another human in a 2 mile radius...a car was heading towards the crossing that i was gonna use...and well the guy...who was driving at around 25mph (roughly 60kmph) slew down and stopped for me....i spent a few minutes trying to figure wat he was doing, with a smile he gestured me to cross....my mind went crazy...made me think of india....even if there was a mob waiting at one of the crossings and if a guy tried to put a toe on the road, it would prbbly be crushed...and yep...we would prbbly have to wait another 3 hrs before we can even think of crossing the road.....sigh...if only we guys could learn something from these ppl...and yeah...i come to know later that pedestrians have the highest priority on these roads....and drivers have to stop!

if you guys don't believe wat i just talked abt in terms of British Roads....take a look at their rule book (which is followed to the fullest mind you) at the Highway Code website

shall keep you posted on the various sights and sounds of uk till i get back in india...and btw...had a lovely flight here once again :) hehe a small stop in Abu Dhabi too....and yeah I did meet my air hostess pal, the same female whom i met on a flight to Mumbai from Abu Dhabi the last time i flew...she recognised me and we had this short chat....she was in the First Class section....(unfortunately :( ).....oh well...didn't stop me and another mate i made in the journey from chatting away with the attendants...we made a romanian, swedish, indian, and arab friend in the 7hr flight to London....hehe all thanks to Airbus' design flaw of keeping the air con lousy near the wings....(where we were seated)...we couldn't stand the heat....rather we were hunting for an excuse to go to the back and chat with them :)....had fun...obviously!!!

till next time


And I'm off on vacation

Its almost 4am and has been one long night. Yep, I’ve been packing and since I leave at 5:30 in the morning to the Railway Station to catch my train to Cochin it doesn’t really make sense sleeping. All those who don’t know me too well, yep I’m a crazy insomniac who doesn’t like the idea of sleeping. I’ve always come home for the weekends from my college in Chengannur during my four years there and there have been days when I hadn’t slept on both Sat night as well as Sun night and I would end up having a nice nap during my labs. Its always fun being caught ‘coz at most times I end up answering all the questions asked by my dearest lecturers when I’m half asleep. Hmmm…have a feeling I ought to sleep more often, might actually come up with some innovation that I can patent and make millions…

Wanted to start this blog entry talking a bit on marriages. I really can’t understand the concept behind putting tons of gold on the bride. I really pity brides on their marriages, they’ve to paste a smile on their faces 24X7 as well as hold all the gold on their neck without stooping. Hmmmmm………guys seriously wats the point in all that? Yes ppl, it does imply that we guys will have to end up giving her a massage on her neck for atleast a month plus to get it back to normal….in case you’re a keralite muslim....increase that tenfold! Our cultures are pretty unique…and I guess I kinda figured out where the world got an idea of putting an ‘L’ board on vehicles with users who’ve just got a new license (alright its not exactly a new license but more of a learner’s license…didn’t want our naughty users to get ideas). You see our nation devised this ages back, its called “virunnu” in here, when the newly weds have to visit every single household in a 3000 mile radius and yep the poor bride will have to carry the ‘L’ board (read ‘tons of jewelry on her neck’)….why? I’ve never understood. Guess it was a scam that was created by our forefathers and the jewel tycoons like Alukkas and Bhima back when we were some molecule of carbon deep within the crust of the earth…..if it were…you guys at Exon and K-Mart…learn something!

Alright I’m kinda happy with my research and I have to say it out again (all those who’ve heard this before..sorry…I’m too excited)…well its something pretty interesting. “More than 90% of all Indian girls have their names ending with a vowel.”  This does include names that end with a ‘Y’…replace that with an ‘I’ or and ‘E’ and it’s the same result…..yaaaaay!!! Three cheers to Shanim and his discoveries :)

There’s another thing I kinda wanna tell you guys about. A friend of mine was telling me about a forward he got. I can’t really remember the exact thing but it was something like this. A guy and a girl were on a bike, the guy was going fast (duh! nothing new!!) and the girl asked him to slow down as she was getting scared (quit nagging for a change). The guy said it was fun and he refused to slow down but after a while he did….and then he suddenly asked her to tell him how much she loved him and then asked her to take his helmet and put it on. The next thing you know the newspapers scream loud and wide that there was a bike accident and the guy dies while the girl survives….

Ok so it does sound pretty sweet and romantic and stuff…but lets give it a second thought. Theoretically, brake failures aren’t dangerous unless you’re going downhill, you’ve run out of road or you’ve no brains. You see, there is something called engine braking wherein you just leave the accelerator, and start lowering the gears as you gradually reduce speed. Yeah it may cause you engine to blow, but hey wat’s more important, your bike’s engine or your life? You decide! Secondly, he asked her to take his helmet off and put it on…now if I were riding a bike with a brake failure, the last thing I would want is a big huge thing taken off my face to take my vision off the road for a few seconds…the way helmets here are designed, lets make that a few minutes! If they did get into an accident, I’m sure it must’ve been ‘coz of that! And lastly, what was he thinking in the first place?!?!?!?? Its his love we’re talking about right? Who would in their sane mind ride a bike recklessly fast when you have your most precious possession behind you? Ok this sounds pretty weird from one of the most reckless bike riders living inside the Corporation of Trivandrum (also known as Thiruvidangore/Travancore/Thiruvananthapuram…and if some ppl have their way with it Ananthapuri)…but well its true, I wouldn’t ever want the person who sits behind me get hurt ‘coz of me, and well if its someone I love, trust me I’d be going as slow as possible :)….you see, knowing ‘that’ person is sitting behind me, I wouldn’t want the ride to end in the first place….so why move fast??

Weird thoughts yes…aaaah weird reminds me, does any1 really know wat the red button with an inverted triangle on your car is for? Apparently none of the drivers in Kerala do. According to them it’s to tell everyone around them that they’re moving forward in a junction and not taking a turn….hmmm…I personally think most of these guys are just warning us how dangerous they can be in a junction and to keep off. For God’s sake it’s a Hazard light!!! Pissed me off the other day when I had taken my darling out to celebrate the lowering of fuel prices here. Got into sooo many thoughts I’d forgotten to pay attention to the road……a long ride later I came to my senses and well I was halfway to Kanyakumari and had already crossed the border into Tamil Nadu!…I really gotta start concentrating! Speaking of which, I made a huge blunder a while back. Had to get tickets for the morning train and since I hate standing in a long line early in the morning, I decided to get it at 9pm….left home and headed to the railway station which is around 13kms from my place, stood in the line and when I had just another person in front of me I realized I had left my wallet in front of my PC!!! sigh, had to come all the way back and go again to get the ticket :( pathetic me!

Anyways, guess this entry is long enough already…stopping for now…will be back in India  second week of October and hopefully shall keep blogging during my vacation.

Cya guys….

My Dearest Family!

Alright ppl, let me introduce you to my lovely family.

The cutest gal in the pic is my little niece, we call her Aachi...her name's Sereen though, next in line my eldest sister, Sainaja...yep the one in UK...she's a bit famous of late...you see the Malayalam papers here had this competition for the best looking marriage pic and...yep u guessed it right, she won and her pic was on the pprs...hehe my bro in law was jealous..he was hoping his pic would turn up :) Next to my sis is a smart young guy...hehe no not talking about moi...talking about my dad :) He's the best!! I'm standing there in the center with my trademark Close-Up smile...yep I'm hoping that some day I'd get into one of those ads and prove that the toothpaste doesn't really work! My third sis, Saneeja, is standing next to me...yeah she looks dazed...don't ask me why...My mom's standing on the right, as you may have noticed all of us are real pooped...explanation? Its my second sister's marriage and it was in the summer...hot is not the word!...My second sis, Sanuja, is seated (duh! its her marriage!) and that's her hubby Binu...my eldest bro in law, Ferozka (that's wat we call him...a mix of Feroz and Ikka...just incase you didn't know that muslims from Kerala call elder brothers ikka) wasn't able to make it 'coz he ended up in bed with Chicken Pox and yea my third sis ain't married then so Sreejith ain't there either...

Will blog again soon...kinda fascinated by this software called Hello...playing around with it....btw...I'm off from Trivandrum tom on my long holiday before i join my company on the 21st of Oct....yep I'm joining Wipro at Bangalore on the 21st of Oct :) yaaaay!

On a serious note....

Hey guys, I'm back...was a little busy with life and hence didn't really get the time to blog. Alright, first for some news, the queen of England has invited me for tea ;) So maybe the queen of England in reality didn't but my cutie pie niece did...and I'm off the UK for a holiday! Yep, will be off in a week's time and will get back prbbly sometime next month. Shall blog from there as often as I can and keep you posted on how pretty the daffodils are.....uhm..alright other stuff too.

Started the day on a very wrong note today....had to drop my dad off at the airport and since I happened to have an Indian license, I can't drive a car :) Just kidding, so maybe i can drive a car, but well I don't have one and hence can't get anywhere. We rented a cab to get to the airport and on the way back I made a huge mistake of responding to the cabbie's conversations. Ended up getting pretty pissed off and well I still am a bit.

It all started off with a discussion of the recent revision of fuel prices here. Hey I agree it may not be thoroughly justified, 'coz all of us have to end up paying a huge sum from our tiny pockets on fuel, which is an essential commodity. But when you think in numbers, it doesn't seem so bad, considering the fact that the oil prices have risen a whole 10$ a barrel while the increase has been restricted to just 3Rs a litre. Yeah I know, there is a huge difference between a barrel and a litre and they could have kept it a notch lower. Oil prices have been on the rise for the past few months and continues to rise all over the world, and India ain't the only place this is happening. Why else would you explain ppl around most developed nations switching over to more efficient engine technologies and environment friendly means of transportation (read as walking). Our country, atleast my state seems to think otherwise. Guess the communism inside them just makes them want to give everything off for charity and put our government in a greater loss than it already is in. Alright so they want the excise duty reduced, I agree that could help. And I really wish the Central Govt does take a look into that....but seriously, will that end all our problems? I don't think so, if its not fuel, its something else! Yesterday was a state-wide protest on the same and none of the taxis, ricks, and private buses were running. Thankfully Trivandrum has a mass transit system that is run by the State Govt, and hence we weren't affected, but the rest of the state suffered....and well this ain't the first time!

Most people here love talking about how China did this and China did that and then about how Russia did this and Russia did that...hey im no anti-communist, infact I was a pro-communism guy till I got down to Kerala (odd isn't it, most ppl change otherwise...guess my Civics texts had me fooled for a while). At present I just can't understand why each party in our country seems to be contradicting their views which they held when they were the opposition. So China has been growing fast, well so have we...the figures show, and that's one of the reasons why Foreign investments in the country are on the rise and that's the reason why most of us have jobs with pays that our parents and grandparents couldn't dream of when they were youths. China has a lovely way of giving everything to their ppl, but they expect their ppl to do their duties perfectly as well, if not....guess I wouldn't know much but I've heard its hell...Indians on the other hand love getting freebies and goodies out their way, but if you ask them to take a walk down the park and buy a newspaper on the way, they'd say its none of their business! You have people here who actually run around protesting for "God knows wat" just 'coz they get a free meal and 50 bucks at the end of the day (at most times even they have no idea wat they're protesting for!). If they had used their senses and just worked for something that could prove to be productive eventually, we'd prbbly never have had to protest in the first place! What's worse? There are people here who complain about VAT. Guess the rates aren't really all that sensible but well I'm glad they're finally auditing taxes...and hopefully within a year or two the rates should come further down rather than the usual up. More than 50% of our population doesn't really pay taxes properly. Do you?? Why even I doubt if I do. Lets take a normal procedure of buying a computer for example (alright so maybe its not normal but this is one instance i could think of), most shops ask you a question before you pay up....do u want a bill? Uhm...if this was any country besides India, the consumer would have screamed the hell out and probably called up some friends in higher places 'coz of that question, but we indians casually ask if the rates would be lower, to which we get a response that we don't need to pay the sales tax then and we readily agree to purchase a 20k-40k commodity without paying a penny to the government. The government at this point must have an idea to probably build a lovely new road from you home to your office, but its short of funds thanks to you not putting in your part. We end up with a road that has more holes than the moon has craters and end up protesting for the same (oh yes, ppl in here would protest for that). I pity our finance minister who tries so much to get some sense into our ppl's heads about this fact, 'coz well as we are, we just prefer taking everything for granted!

Anyways, I put the conversation to an end when he actually mentioned that he would prefer having the rules of Saudi Arabia in India (no offense to those from KSA). hmmmm...so i guess he's a guy who prefers being held on four sides by bars rather than the freedom which our forefathers so bravely fought to achieve. The air we breath, the words we speak and the thoughts we let out....our freedom! Just can't understand how ppl could have such thoughts crossing their minds. Trust me guys, I've seen things there and I've met people from all over the world (Indians ie.) who just wanna get back and get work here if our country is ready to provide them a decent living. Something that at present seems possible, provided we do something. :) You have no idea how proud I felt when I was in Abu Dhabi talking about the oppurtunities that our country promises us now, our IT sector (it has its problems but its great)...our airlines industry....and almost everything under the sun. Life's just so much better here and we've got all the freedom our heart desires. And yet we complain about the same freedom we take for granted! Oh well.....this is out to deaf ears...so might as well shut up.


To all those from the US (including any Govt Agency that may be reading this including Blogger.com's administrators), these are individual views and not meant to cause hatred, but just love for my country. I have absolutely nothing against any of the nations I've mentioned in the article or yours and respect the way of life in the respective countries with all my heart. All I wish to express in this is my frustration at my own people who so readily complain about their Govt, when they are not ready to do anything themselves.

Just another Friday in Trivandrum

Hey guys, thanks for all the feedback :) Alright Alright, I get the picture, will cut down the length of my posts from now on. Hope you guys will continue visiting.

Today I finally went for Friday prayers after a whole 2 weeks....no I wasn't lazy, its just that life wasn't letting me. Two weeks back I was halfway home from Abu Dhabi (ok so maybe Bangalore ain't halfway, but you get the picture) and then last week I was in Administrative hell....also called Kerala Water Authority....the buggers actually charged us close to 5k on water! Alright so we haven't been paying for 10 yrs, but seriously, hasn't God gifted us water and hasn't He given us the right to use water without paying for it!?! Sigh....anyways after a bunch of walking up to different offices strategically placed 10 kms apart from each other in the city, I've finally been instructed by the accounts dept in my ward to pay the bill 4 days later (4 days from today ie.) as he has to update the details of my account. Four days to update a record?? Talk about efficiency....uhm...but wait, I would too, 'coz it would take forever to find a record in the piles of dusty files that lie in these offices.

Anyways, back to where I'd started, I went for prayers and it felt good. Finally got to talk to God about a few things I needed. Its like a huge shopping list everytime I go for Juma'a. Once the prayer was over, I was out and on my way to my bike, which I had to park on the other side of the newly constructed underpass in the city. This is another architectural wonder in Trivandrum. Why a wonder you ask? Well firstly, it really doesn't serve a purpose (yet). The approach roads are designed such that you will reach the tunnel at an alarming speed of 10kmph! No I didn't miss a digit there, I actually meant ten kilometers per hour! The other day I had decided to actually use this underpass....wanted to go from Palayam to Bakery Junction and well this was the best option (the alternative was to drive...ok ride my bike 4kms round two stadiums and cut in to ..... oh well u get the pt, go a long way round). I moved in a real slow pace and finally got to the tunnel, was impressed at the design (barring the bump at the bottom of the tunnel) and was able to cruise through at 80kmph (yeah guys 80 is pretty fascinating here....and considered reckless, more on that later) and finally when i got out of it I get to see a broken down sign that says "One Way"!!! A huge screech and a stare from the man in white and khaki later I was stopped right at the center of the road. Started moving reeeeally slowly and with a huge smile I asked the cop if it was safe to move further or had I lost another 100bucks as a ticket. He just laughed and said it was ok...shocked me! Supposedly PWD considers all sign boards on the road as art and they refuse to remove the same once its no longer required....wats worse? The real "One ways" don't have signboards, just a cop on the other side of the road with a big fat book of tickets. (I've always been lucky, high speeds and tactical movements behind buses and ricks have always helped)

Speaking of my riding, yes ppl I'm considered unsafe on the roads, and so are the rest of the licensed drivers in Trivandrum. Owing to my speeds, most people refrain from sitting pillion on my bike (barring a few friends who love taking risks....got all of them to sign Life insurance with me as the benefactor ;)). So the next time you are in Trivandrum and you see a Blue CBZ with a person whose face is blinded by a bright white light (no this is not my halo....neither is it an ad for a toothpaste...its just the glare off my forehead) avoid sticking your hand out for a lift, 'coz im sure you would regret it.

So what exactly had I started this blog for again....aaah yesh, the Palayam underpass...Its soo beautifully constructed and the engineers have to be applauded for their innovation. This can surely be considered the most idiotic construction as we actually have to walk almost a km to cross over to the other side of the tunnel thanks to there being no provisions for pedestrians....to the guys at Punj & Lloyd, atleast a ropeway would have been good.....besides that, well I'm in for progress, and I'm sure within a year or two, once the road works are finally complete in our heavily dug up town, its gonna be one smooth ride.

Suggestion to Punj & Lloyd, please allot a lane for protesters from the Secreteriat to the Legislative Assembly. You really don't need to build more roads, just get that done and all traffic problems in the city shall disappear.

A Trip to Abu Dhabi

Time for my first blog entry. Alright so I finally decided to get some air and sunlight everyday for atleast 2 hours. And taking advantage of this decision I was stuffed with a bunch of bills which were due by my dad. Darn! Oh well, another visit to BSNL's office, the guys whom I really adore, won't hurt would it?

Anyways, thankfully the customer care offices out here are more friendlier than the buggers who end up in the technical support, so that went well. That reminds me, I installed a new device on my bike. Its something that sounds whenever I change the gears on the bike. All you have to do is listen up for the "aaah" coming out of my mouth! :) Alright so its not a device, that spider really had a good bite on my left foot. Maybe I shouldn't have been so harsh on the guy. Could have signed a contract with the guy for Pest Control. Ofcourse, I would've had to take the pain of preparing a Specs list which he would have to oblige to and then this would be followed by setting up a good site for his home. And then I would have had to get some rules set apart for cleanliness and noise levels. Hmm...wonder if the corporation would require me to fill some forms for all this. Oh well, guess the kiddo wouldn't be able to handle the pains of reading through my Specs list anyway.

Was gonna tell you people of my hometown right? Not talking about Trivandrum, but Abu Dhabi. So where shall I start? A pretty expensive flight and a huge crappy procedure of purchasing a Visit Visa for around 500Dhs (revised to 1200Dhs now) will give you the access to one of the most happening town of the middle east (NOT! Although an hour and a half drive would get you to Dubai which IS the MOST happening City of the Middle East, this is more like its sleeping brother). Speaking of flights, you do have a cheaper option. Its a tube which is fitted with two cows up front, has wheels similar to the ones on bullock carts and runs on grass and has been christianed Air India Express. You needn't worry about anything as long as you don't get into one of these cheap excuses of air travel. They flight attendants will pretend you're not there, charge you for the air you breath and probably a dollar for the earphones which were used by drunkard who threw up on the last flight. Hungry? Yeah they do provide food, its a round thing the shape of a donut but chewing the same would remind you of pebbles you stuffed into your mouth when you were a kid....(you guys didn't? ok i guess its just me), they call it a vada and charge you 2 dollars for the same. Hmm...oh well lets get back to the flight I went by, Ettihad Airways! That's the true way to fly, not too expensive yet its got features that put Emirates to shame. Sigh, I manged to bug all the flight attendants in there. Coffee, Cappuchino, Hot Chocolate, Arabic Kebabs, Lamp Chops, ..... aaaaah my mouth still waters thinking of it. Poor them, they must've banned me from that airline after the pain they went through in the two and a half hour flight that I had from Mumbai to Abu Dhabi.

Now once you get to Abu Dhabi, you have to go and get your eye checked....or that's wat the security officer said. How nice of them, I was having trouble with my contact lenses anyways. There was this huge line there, but what the heck, its free and I don't really need to take the pains of going to a lousy doc who keeps complaining about how rare I take those lenses off. It was my turn, a stylish "Asalam Aleikum" later, they stuff me onto a machine where I was to show my eyes. Two seconds later an alarm pops up and I find a bunch of security guards around me. Jeez, I never knew having a problem with my eyesight would cause such a big problem. One guy kept his cool and asked me to try again, and well it came off pretty well and the screen showed a green light indicating my eyes were fine after all. Gotta get that report from them and meet my doc. Took me a while to realise that it wasn't a eye test after all...hehe was a retina scan and I was actually identified as a terrorist! Ouch!

A small wait at the baggage counter and I was outta there, a big smile in front of the security guy who opens up bags was enough for him to say "Stop!" Crap...there goes my pirated DVDs, but to my surprise all he said was, "use this door you crazy oaf!". Phew! that was close, I remember a friend of mine being caught for bringing a tape of his tour across India, supposedly they felt it was some porn movie and made him stay for a whole three hours to check the whole tape. Pity the guy! :) Parents were waiting out and as usual I had grown thin. Parents have this funny way of visualizing you as a real thin baby everytime you gain 4kgs! Out into the sun and into the silky roads (as expressed by a British reporter) of Abu Dhabi. A half an hour drive takes you to the island city of Abu Dhabi.

Alright now that you have reached Abu Dhabi, I shall point out a certain pecularity about my town. There is a certain big white thing with a blue stripe across it which you may come across if you are lucky. We call it the Unicorn of the City.....the Govt calls it the
Municipality Public transport. The city has the most lousiest excuse of mass transit in the world! They have a bunch of bus stops all over the city, but even a 24hour wait in there won't get you anywhere! Ofcourse you'll get a bunch of cabbies honking at you, mocking you rather than offering a lift. If you have some sanity (its a measely 48 degrees in the shade), you would probably get into one of the white golden cabs. A word of caution, do not sit in the front seat!!!!!! esp if you are a girl.....uhm....no actually the rule applies even if you are a guy.

Coming back to the ride. Well Taxis are pretty cheap, guess the guys who set the rates do realise that no1 would pay any more for the smell and courteous nature of the cabbies there. You will be greeted with a lovely smile and a smell that would probably get you a one way ticket to the nearest morgue. Try your best to pretend that you don't know hindu or arabic or any other language he tries to speak to you in. Just tell him your destination and pretend your on a call. Trust me, its not worth it. I've made a bunch of blunders by being friendly with these guys....uhm not really friendly, just spoke! Well there was once when these guys started talking about all.....gals close your eyes...the oh crap i can't say it....gals you can open your eyes...anyways, there was one incident that I could tell you about. I was silently sitting in the cab observing the Corniche on my way to my gym (yeah guys I was soo insanely bored I was a regular at the GYM!!) and suddenly the cabbie next to me picks out his pompons and cheers "give me a J...give me an I...give me an H...give me an A...give me a D...goooooo JIHAD!") A strange stare later he starts talking to me...oh no i can't handle this! Keeps asking me to listen to the radio and puts the volume on max...uhm..well I tried...tried hard, but i just couldn't understand Pushto! And there he started off explaining how 3 americans were killed in a bombing in Iraq! Uhm...he rejoices for that?!?!?! oh well a long conversation (owing to my destination being a 5dh journey....hehe guys from Dubai get jealous!! ;) 5dh journey = approx 10kms) followed and I asked him why Islam seems to be preaching hatred when the religion is the most peaceful religion the world has seen. And he gives his views on how Americans has oppressed his ppl and he feels happy everytime an american dies. hmmmm....Just couldn't get this into my system anyways....'coz well I'm Muslim and as far as I know it, Islam doesn't believe in walking around with massive loads of explosives strapped on and blowing up ppl! Fine so Batman did have a utility belt with the same number of explosives....come to think of, I wonder wat would've happened if he accidentally pushed the wrong button on his utility belt. July 4th a little early maybe ;)

Oh well those are the bad parts of it, but well Abu Dhabi is lovely. Get out of your Ice Cold flats, that often remind me of Tensings journey to the Mount Everest, you get to see lovely gardens, malls, and the works. The city boasts of many wonders, as an example we have an underpass on the corniche road which always makes me wonder why only one side of the Dual carraigeway seems to be going under while the other side of the traffic is up, with absolutely nothing above the underpass but a small patch of grass. hmmmmmm architectural wonder. And then you have two buildings with a ball on its peak which houses some of the richest and craziest corporate executives in the country. Its the HQ of the only Telecom company in the country...trust me their rates are alarming! I spent over 300Dhs....uhm...maybe more than that on just telephone cards! Uhm...alright so I was calling IDD but still! (Dad Mom, Don't believe this, I'm just lieing...its all part of a humour exercise that I'm going through)

Talking about rich people, well the city also hosts the most expensive hotel in the world! Expensive in construction, expensive in cost of rooms, expensive in all aspects of life! To give you an idea of how expensive, the cost of the construction is in the tune of 5 billion dollars! Each room has two 67 inch plasma screens and a walk in wardrobe and....oh well I can't get in there so why talk about it? Its the Emirates Palace Hotel. Abu Dhabi felt that they were not in the map and so they built it in the span of two years. Word of advice, sue the guy who sold you the Atlas of America and told you Abu Dhabi wasn't in it. Oh well they are happy and I'm happy to be a part of the construction of that bldg. You see, as i said I was extremely bored in Abu Dhabi and ended joining a company there as a trainee for a month and a half. They were the guys who did the security systems in the Palace Hotel. Trust me, technology can get no more sophisticated than it is in there!

Hangouts? Well you've always got the Marina Mall and the Abu Dhabi Mall...if you're interested in having a petty quarrel over a 11th grade girl, you might as well go to the Grand Al Maria Mall :) Speaking of food, there are a bunch of outlets there that I'm sure most of us would fancy, but well a word of warning you're sure to gain a lot of weight and then repent for the rest of your life! Look at me!!!

Well hope you had a nice visit to Abu Dhabi, hope to see you again when you're out of the Immigration Prison here...

cyaz guys

I'm seriously inspired...

Hey guys, thanks for the response. You guys made me think twice(it was hard) and actually start a blog. I'll probably get that ready by the year 2010, so keep watching this space (or rather any other space you find that suits your fancy) :) Alright, I'm kidding, shall get one up real soon and let you guys know about it. Finally something to kill time.

Sameer, bad news, I never write :) you see I'm a pack of lazy bones and although I've been pestered by a zillion* of my College Magazine Editors, I haven't taken the pains yet. Let's see how the blog goes. Btw, to keep you guys occupied, I would seriously recommend Vinod's blog. The guy is from Chennai and placed in Infosys and trust me he is GOOOOOOD!!!! I had a lovely time laughing reading his thoughts on the ever famous Captain. For those of you who haven't seen tamil movies, he's the guy who's got his left leg on the grave (he's still pretty young though, just a measely 84), the right leg on the police jeep, armed with a pistol that can pierce through the toughest of concrete walls. And yeah, you won't find this guy going after gals, 'coz he's trying his best to get all the younger cuties off his back...supposedly he's irresistible! Uhm...if any of you girls actually find him so....pleeeeeeease let me know wat I could do to get that popular ;) And yeah, he has one thing that's a trademark of all police officers in the country. Come on guys, you don't need to work that brain of yours for that...its called a potbelly!

check it out, its http://vinodg.blogspot.com/ If you want that particular artile on the captain, its http://vinodg.blogspot.com/2004/10/unforgettable-captain.html and hey i don't know the guy...got this link through a friend of mine and I'm pretty impressed by his smart use of sarcasm. I really loved the intro on that particular article....its a must read guys!

So we have a huge conversation of stocks. Talk about the world's most formal word for "Gambling". :) Alright alright, we need a lot more brains that just the know-how of how to pull a stick and yell hoooray to get some money out of a Stock Exchange, but when you think about it, isn't all those fancy words just a ploy to get more of your money? For those of you who are pretty much illiterate on this, stocks don't usually reflect on a company's profits or losses or their performance over a fiscal. Those are valuable only to those people who eagerly wait for the dividends that the companies issue once every year. The price of these stocks, like most commodities in the market increase and decrease based on demand and well if I had a trillion dollars in my pocket (wonder how I could stuff that into my pockets in the first place) I could probably get the price of the most lousiest company up by over 20%. Thankfully such things haven't happened out here in India yet, but it did happen out there in the US a few years back and ended up with a bunch of corporate heads being sued bigtime! I see the same thing happening in the most youngest and promising stock markets, Dubai Financial Market, as well. Out there you see a bunch of oil rich guys in white dishdashas (for those of you who think that's a boxing match, think again, its the arabic word for their dress which is a national heritage and can get u behind bars in some prison halfway into a lonely desert if you put it on :) ) have a nice coffee at the coffee shop located inside the market and decide which stock to sc@#w and which no to. So I get back to my initial question, how is this different from gambling?

Today i discovered something on the net. Pretty proud of it actually. I discovered that too much of it can get reaaaaaally boring! I spent three hours this morning staring at the numerous instant messengers that I have installed for someone to come online. Took me a while finally decide on getting out of my home and getting some fresh air. Opened my door only to find a certain spider who was actually shouting at me for having messed up his 3 month old home. The guy had the nerve of settling in without a lease and now he refuses to leave. When i finally kicked him out, he spat on my face and bit me on my leg. Thankfully it has resulted only in a minor swelling which i'm sure would lead to something drastic tomorrow and my left foot might need to be amputated. Anyways, one thing led to another and I was blinded for a whole 15 minutes. Got scared seeing something soooo bright on my face....it seemed soo beautiful yet it hurt my eyes soo much.....took me a while to realise it was the sun shining onto my face. Yipes! I really need to get my head checked! Anyways managed to get outta my house on my bike which has been due for service for the last six months....sigh....poor darling of mine...she was coughing all the way, patted her as much as i could and apologised for not thinking of her for quite sometime. Think she's angry with me....she didn't speak to me halfway through.....

uhm...that reminded me....don't believe in ads! The other day I decided to fill Extra Premium on my bike, filled a whole 100 bucks worth and it looked pretty neat on my fuel dial as well. Took my darling for a spin, went around almost all parts of this beautiful town of trivandrum which is oh so filled with protestors and lazy govt staff who love taking their day off. Come to think of it, they really do exercise a lot. I mean it does take a lot of energy to scream out the same ol' slogans through the roads and walk around 4 kilometres from the Kerala Secreteriat to the Kerala Legislative Assembly. Why didn't I think of that? Hey anyone from Trivandrum interested in blocking traffic for the next week, I think I have a protest up my head.....lets see....yeah "A Protest against protests!" :) how's that? Alright back to my darling and me on our romantic ride around .....uhm...alright lets just picture a beautiful green grassland (can't really make trivandrum seem romantic)...felt my darling screaming for a drink in between, but like the ad when i checked up the fuel dial and the length of the road, it seemed fine guess i could get to the next fuel station without a prob. ...... you guessed it right...my guess was absolutely wrong! Had a ball of a time dragging my bike all the way to the nearest BP station for some Speed (and this time around no way there is absolutely no gain of Speed by putting that thing in her!). So guys don't believe in ads.....or wat Shanim says, 'coz I just made that up :) hehe...alright fine so maybe i forgot to put the fuel position back on main after a long drive in reserve...but hey I need to blame some1!

Alright guys, guess most of you don't want me to write long mails so I shall cut this short....uhm...oops...its already long! aaaaaaaah I really gotta do something about my fingers!

* zillion = 3

The miseries of dealing with Govt Organisations...

Alright call me lazy. This morning i woke up to find my ever so efficient broadband connection dead. I was in a state of shock. Without hesitation, I'd called up the local customer care center here in Trivandrum and I got an appointment for the evening. Aaaaaaaaaah! How was I to survive the whole morning without exchanging bits of 1s and 0s to ppl around the world?!!?!? I would be cut off from civilization for just too long! Naheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Alright once the whole drama queen session was done with i decided to get some sleep and wake up when I was a little more sane. Guess I needed a real long time for that 'coz i ended up waking up at 12pm!

Anyways, lets get back to my connection. Thought of doing some diagnosis on my own. With my excellent skills in networking (NOT!) I was determined to get my connection up and running before BSNL could even call me back and say they're coming. Sigh failed miserably, called up a friend of mine working in Dell and armed with his suggestions I tried again. All in vain! In protest I decided not to eat food until I got it working. But well my darling network adapters still wouldn't budge. Talk about arrogrance and being stubborn.

Few more hours of struggling and I figured that the DSL modem was working fine and so were the cables that connected it to my pc. Figured that it was some configuration fault and thanks to Bill Gates ingenuity of making things soooo simple, he had actually managed to do away with most of the tweaking options that were once available. Sigh...alright alright, Tux fans are gonna be real happy with this. Finally I get a call from the buggers at BSNL asking me to get out for once and open the gate! :) was sooo stuck onto my PC that i didn't realise they were standing in the sun waiting for me to open the door :) Thought my worries were finally over....sigh if only.

They came, checked the modem and actually duplicated my connection (don't ask me why, guess they felt that duplicating would force the NICs to behave and listen to the commands behest upon by his masters). You guessed it right, didn't help. They played around with the Ethernet cables, switching from one NIC to another (btw...i have two, the second one was meant for my internal home LAN which i never got to execute....lazy to pull the wires and do the trunking :)) all in vain. Finally they came to the conclusion that it would work in Win 98 but no WinXP...ironic since i've been using it on my Windows XP system for almost 3 months now. Oh well, they're the "engineers", I let them have it their way. Rebooted onto Win98 and thanks to the "plug and play" wonders of the OS it didn't detect either of my network cards. So they confirmed that it will work on Win98 and that it was not their fault.

They were fleeing immediately after that but I didn't let them out. Slammed the door shut and sealed all exits. Asked them to prove it, and I brought one of my ol' shabby laptops (alright alright its not mine, my sisters which I was supposed to have sold off six months ago...hehe I've already told u guys, I'm lazy). It took almost eternity to load and finally i got the network set up on it. Sadly for me, (something I already knew) it worked fine. And they said "See its working now we leave", I blinked and they were gone. Houdini would have been proud!

With my last ounce of energy, i sat back in front of my pc and decided to have one last shot at it. WinKey+Pause/Break, Hardware Tab, Device Manager, right-click NIC1, uninstall, right-click NIC2, uninstall, F5, new hardware found, your hardware is ready to use, close all windows, start, connect to...., bsnl, connect.....VOILA!!!!! It worked!!!!!

You have no idea how many times I'd banged my head on the wall for being sooooo stupid!! And well, I suddenly have a real big disregard for BSNL employees. I did the honour of asking them if they were engineers just before they left. They said they were and that they had never encountered a problem like this before and that they usually just install and go. It was not their duty to make sure that the OS understood what they did and worked as they wanted it to. Sigh...

Oh well, that's my story for the day. Moral of the story....Don't pick up the phone and dial BSNL's customer care for an Engineer to visit your house when the lazy engineer in you is screaming for exposure.

Doesn't make sense does it? hehe....i know it doesn't to me, but well im bad at literature :)

Applying Thought

As I was browsing the net, came across an article on economictimes.com that got my interest. It said "Wipro plans European acquisitions". Since it was about our company, thought have taking a good look at it. I'm glad I did read it.

The following statements caught my eye:

"Wipro can choose from 280,000 engineering graduates every year, with another 200,000 college diploma-holders who are easily trainable. In the United States annually there are just 50,000 engineering graduates. In fact colleges produce more sports therapists than engineers," Wipro's chairman said. Education, Premji said, is the fuel that drove India's growth. But he knows that while there has been investment in higher studies, there has not been the same commitment to primary education. The result is that a third of the population over the age of 15 has no schooling, the report observed. So the Azim Premji Foundation, a not-for-profit organization which spends 5 million dollars a year, focuses on improving India's elementary education.

Wouldn't all of you, my future colleagues, agree that our Company Chairman deserves more than just a mere applause for such a gesture! Education in our country surely needs all the funds it can get. But does funds really materialize into educated youths? I wouldn't think so. Literate, maybe, but far from educated. India really needs to look up its educational policies once again.

I come from Kerala, which boasts to be one of the most literate states in the country. However, our state does suffer from the lack of major developments owing to the pessimism shown by people in the state. It isn't a wonder that Keralites are second only to Bihar in terms of emigrants. Almost all major development programs are looked into with skeptism, too much if you ask me. Who do we end up blaming? Our Government. Personally, I think its our educational system that is to blame. Our schools have syllabi that force us to sit in the corner of our room and read through big fat books and produce essays ten pages long for our exams without any understanding whatsoever. And what more? Taking any course besides Engineering/Medicine is considered a shame. Aren't there a million other professions in this world? If it wasn't for the commerce stream, we wouldn't have Chartered Accountants or Businessman. Wait, we don't! I guess its the same all over India,
and besides funding primary and secondary education, I believe we could do a lot more.

Ironically I am studying for engineering as well, but I did so out of interest and not of compulsion or that a certain fortune teller told me that there would be a boom for the IT industry in 2005 :)

Kudos to Azim Premji and Wipro. Let's Apply Thought not just on our computers, but for humanity!


Hey ppl!

Alright guys, finally thought of starting my blog. Since I can't seem to think of writing anything now, I'll just post a few crazy mails I'd sent to the groups I subscribe to over the past few months.

Take care