Ho Ho Ho!

A very merry Christmas to all of you out there! I love this day....quite a few reasons, one of it being gifts...sadly Santa seems to be forgetting me almost every year, but its always fun seeing kids' eyes glowing when they see themselves surrounded by gifts.

And there is something else special about this day. Its the only day when overweight guys (I plan on joining this group pretty soon) are really looked upon :) After all...Mr. Claus is hell overweight! And all of seem to be spoiling his diet by treating him with milk and cookies on X'mas eve......hmmm...think about it, with a population of over 1.5 billion, lets say around 40% of the same celebrate Xmas.....of which a generous 40% (most of us are lazy to bake those cookies in the first place, the rest would've finished it before our moms could leave some for our fat delivery boy :) ...ok ok sorry Santa...now i know why he's been forgetting me)....now with those numbers, its a lot of cookies...the guy must be gaining atleast 300kgs every Xmas eve! Poor him...uhm...wait I should be feeling sorry for his reindeers!

Speaking of giving, since I'm completely broke, I've decided to dedicate this blog to all my friends whom I had planned big gifts for but ended up being broke and couldn't even afford a 'Mentos' for them. This blog is dedicated to all my pals who made me who I am....will be mentioning a few names, but since I have too many complaints coming around about how long my posts are, I wouldn't be able to put all your names...sorry guys

First and foremost, let me start with my dearest gang in school....Akshath, Jameel, Jasim and Livin....the five of us were often call the Backside boys...no we weren't a band and we sucked at singing...but well there was another reason for the name. It all started with our Math sir in the 11th grade..the bugger couldn't speak english for peanuts! We guys prefered sitting at the back, you see its more comfortable sitting there and sleeping rather than smelling his mouth stuffed with 'paan' and suffocating to death! He hence called us Backside...we modified it a bit :)

uhm...small rewind, going back to my 9th and 10th, it was Mudassir, Abizar and Osama...something common here? Yep all four of us are muslims and we lived nearby...I was the only southie in the gang and maaan did I have a tough time learning Hindi (Mumbai-style)....rather learning how to speak the language...I still can't write well...hehe I studied the language for over six years and I still suck at it! The last Hindi exam I wrote, I passed with just 5 marks above the pass mark...and this was after a 11 hour phone conversation with another pal of mine Ajay (the guy was a brainiac!!!!) discussing every single mathra in the bloody classwork book...did it work? naaaaa...:) Muddi is out in Dubai trying to figure out why he is still studying when all of us are working and Abizar is in Pune trying to figure out which chemical would result in the next fuel revolution (he's a Chem Engineer)...as for Osama....if any of you know where this guy is, please do inform me....the last I heard was that he was walking around someplace in Mumbai looking like the local "Bhai"....hmmm...

Mumbai reminds me...Vicky...buddy how can I forget ya??? Vikas is a guy who is still a kid by heart....and he's got a stomach that seems to have no end. Doctors tried to figure things out by telling him he had a stone and operated on it...they're still baffled. The guy can stuff himself with two whole pizzas, 2 burgers and a 1 foot Subway sandwich and still have enough space in his stomach to eat dinner at home.....which usually is a lot of rice and a couple of curries. Yeah now you guys know where I got my eating habits from! The guy is a big fan of Manga cartoons...so if any of you have a bunch of Pokemon or similar cartoon tapes...let me know..

The blog would seriously be incomplete if I don't mention two gals who really left a mark in my life...Aparna and Zahabiya.......yep yep thaliya thaliya...and yes I was teased with both these gals in school....uhm...come to think of it I was teased with all gals in school....sigh...A2Z...now I remember :( alright let me get back to wat I was trying to write out here. Two real sweet gals, seriously! Zahabiya was the short tempered...wait...wat am i saying "was"...she is still the same short tempered idiot who keeps getting bugged about everything around her...esp me :) hehe I'm scared to meet her now actually, might end up getting my leg amputated or something....but I admire the gal a lot for the strength she had and got through some of the worst things in life :) as for Aparna...she's one of the sweetest gals I know...yep I know there are quite a few of her classmates who would beg to differ...but hey...she is!

Speaking of strong ppl...I can't forget Sushmita there....she's actually the strongest gal pal I've made in my life...and probably the most creative of the lot...she's out there planning her new Youth Mag for Chennai...the very best of luck to her!

So I've missed many pals but I better move onto college else I just won't finish this post! College got me a big sister (yep in addition to the three I already have)...her name's Sheetal...the gal has soo much energy in her, I'm sure it would be enough to power the whole of South India!!! She was more or less my mini mentor in college, esp during those lousy Jr-Sr ego clashes...Vicky is busy looting her off her salary at this very moment by hogging away a bunch of free dinners :) Sheetal...don't worry, I'll be there soon :)

My hostelmates....Vijay, Ajith, Aji, Aneesh, Bobby, Jom, Saras, Abhi, Fiyaz, Ameen, Jose, Sujith, Jobin, John, Mathai, Pattar, Sukesh, Thahsin, Shaheen, Tinku, Shamju, Anuraj, Geo, Sony, Costy, Naigil, Sanju and every1 else from the MH....thanks for bringing a smile on my face everyday and the billion kicks on my ass for my birthday!

My roomie for three years, Shameer....the guy has seriously great talent with his guitar...wonder if he'll make a good replacement for Santana.....hmmmmm...naaaa maybe not ;)

My projectmates...Basheer and Manoj...these guys are the best...Basheer for one taught us all to take life as cool as possible and Manoj...the guy can make any situation hilarious.....if he were writing this blog instead of me, I'm sure half you guys would end up having a high BP for the laughter induced!

Anu Jose Pala....the idiot whom I made my little sis...she's the gal who taught me how to talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk....and then realise that my bill has actually sky rocketed!!!

Jayarani...a gal who thinks of everything...let me explain, on our tour to Goa and Bangalore in the 3rd year, she carried everything except the kitchen sink....seriously! anything we needed, she had in one of her bags!

Deepak, Manu, Vivin, Silas, Sajan, Sneha, Bency and all the other juniors in the Training and Placement Cell of my college...it was teamwork in lieing to different companies about how great our college was.....it was only when I was out of college that I realised we weren't really lieing!!!

Alright so maybe she's not from my college, but Susan...a friend who has always managed to bring a smile on my face even at my worst days....yeah she doesn't realise this but everytime I call her to console her about her endless problems ;) (she's surely gonna kill me for this), she goes on laughing at every sentence I speak...yeah some call it madness...but I call it cute...and yeah...she's one of the only ppl who comment on my site every other week....(Sameera you're another one...shall include you in my next post for sure)....speaking of Susan...how can I forget dear ol' Anoop...the nutty idiot who does the craziest of things...as an example...this guy actually travelled from his college to his place in Trv around 4 hrs and then went back halfway and got back home all in a day's time (or was it two?)....watever and the reason was pretty funny...not getting into that, 'coz im sure he's already ready to beat me up!

And last but not the least...Tina...the sweetest gal I've met...she's celebrating her Birthday today, so lets all wish her a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! :)

So that's my Christmas gift for this year...hope all of you enjoyed it....

Merry Christmas once again!!!!!!!

PS: To all those whose names I haven't mentioned....am reeeeally sorry, but this post is getting waaaaay too long...sorreeeeee


Did you guys hear the latest? The ppl in fat chairs who call themselves politicians have finally decided to heed to the tears of the 6.5million people in Bangalore and are doing something about it....uhm...well i guess they took it a bit too literally when we asked for a change in Bangalore. They've decided to rename the city to Bengaluru....hmmm....sigh if only they had the brains of an ant to think straight! And what more? We've got a bunch of crazy journalists who have suddenly voiced their concern regarding the same, and that the government is making a mistake by doing so (to which i partially agree...not until i read the rest of the sentence) as this may lead to a confusion with the state 'Bengal' (trust me guys, i couldn't stop laughing reading that...I'm sure a bunch of my senior managers would have been staring at me when i did). Talk about the world going nuts! We've got a city who has barely 10m of tar remaining on all its roads (which theoretically comes to over 300-500kms in length) and yet all they can think of is a change in name to bring back the sentiments in Kannadigas...Man I'm glad Kannadigas ain't as insane as the bunch who rule the state....watch out kerala...you've got competition!

Now that you get an idea of how much i detest crazy politicians who seem to crap a lot about doing stuff let me get into another thought. Have any of you bought gifts for girls? Maaaan seriously complicated...its an absolute injustice giving us sooo much of choice....gals have it simple, all you need to do is get something that uses a battery or an AC adapter and we are absolutely happy, on the other hand with gals you've got a billion and one choices and you are bound to go wrong watever u get! (and this from a guy who has three sisters!!!) If only we could get into those heads for just a tiny second to figure out wat they would like and not frown thinking how cheap/boring/unimaginative/....and anything else that matches the criteria of loser about us.

Haven't really talked much about my company to you guys have I? Well its a fun place, you get good food for cheap, and Wipro has done a great job in improving the environment (no not just in terms of gals, but the campus is kewl). We've been having fun from the day we've joined, no pressure, no1 to boss us around, our managers are all smiles when they talk to us (and yes...quite often I've wondered if they are plotting against us while we think they are happy about us) and well........yep we're jobless! Atleast for a while...we are in what we call 'Free Pool'....

Its pretty simple, we come to work early morning at 8:30 and we are asked to report to the billiards room and play pool till 6 in the evening...:) alright so maybe we don't have a billiards room, its just what companies call 'Bench'. The transition period between training and being in a project....won't be long before I curse myself for having written this post coz of how busy I will get....sigh....being a Software 'Techie' (don't really know wat that means but it sounds kewl when Times of India keeps referring to us like so) can be a pain, but well it pays for my food, fuel, iPod, cellphone, etc. etc :) so can't really complain!

Taking off for now...CIAO

Bangalore's way of saying...you're dumb!

Ever heard of a place that sells you Reebok shoes for under 1000Rs? You do??? hehe address please :)

I really can't understand the concept of charging over 30% of the price for just a lousy logo which is bound to come off in a month's time anyways. Anyone from Nike or Reebok who could enlighten me on this? Ok so I guess all of you are busy trying to figure out what the @#%#$#@ is this bugger getting at? Is there a point...uhm...confession..nope :) Was out shopping yesterday, went out to Marathahalli...and for all those guys who haven't heard of it, its a part of town where you can get almost all branded products for half the price...why?? why you ask me? well these are factory seconds...and no that doesn't mean that the janitor in the textile factory used the clothes to wash the floors or something like that, it just means that there is a defect in the clothes which no1 would notice in the first place...uhm..yep an ant might, 'coz u see the bugger might just trip over the loose thread as he heads to his destination..with only his mission in mind...'bite shanim bite shanim'....ouch! alright I get the point, won't steal your bread crumbs anymore...happy? alright now that the guy has gone to reinforcements I shall continue...

Just realised I hadn't finished my earlier sentence....alright so basically we were there buying clothes and shoes and whatever food I could put in my tiny stomach (it ain't all that tiny actually) and at the end of it we decided to push off to MG Road...nope we had no plans of comparing prices and no we weren't there to tell every1 how brilliant we were to have purchased all those things for under 400Rs each...but well I need some eye exercise you see....Its funny how we always manage to enjoy the beauties of life when we are there....but its sad we wouldn't even bother speaking to a single one (to all those who have been confused till this point about heavenly bodies...nope im not talking about stars...talking about the fair sex :) ) 'coz somewhere deep within you feel they just might end up being a pain in the ass eventually. Come to think of it...most are...and yep half the world is out to get you broke...and the other half is already broke 'coz well...that half are us guys! A friend of mine was just telling me how she makes her guy recharge her cellphone and how she doesn't call him but makes him do so....hmmm...tragic situation i must say...but then again...hehe if I were the guy, I would do the same....maan we die for attention don't we????

Enough of that crap....the worst part of my day was just approaching...we had this long day and we decided to end it by one last hurdle...getting into a BMTC bus from the commissionarate bus stop (yes yes i got the spelling wrong and I have absolutely no plans of walking all the way there to correct myself!)...It was waaay past 9:30 and my last bus, which is the 9pm '141E' was long gone....speaking of which, BMTC has this lovely way of numbering their bus routes....they put numbers and this is followed by letters....and the source and destination of the bus will always (as a law set by a saddist who is laughing away somewhere in his guest house at this very moment) in kannada. The number seem nice and well organised, but there are over 26 routes on a single number...as an example, there is a bus route 201...suffixed by A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z,AA,AB.....etc etc and if you were dumb enough to get into the wrong bus, you wouldn't know until the bus driver suddenly took a turn off some traffic light from where it is absolutely impossible to get off...simply because the buggers in the bus just don't let you move! Mumbai Suburbans seem soooo much better...you ain't travelling blind there!

Alright so as I was saying...we were waiting at the bus stop and I had just realised that I was to take one of the million 201s....sigh I hated that bus! Why you ask me? Well for one, I almost lost my mobile in that bus and well its almost always crowded and most of the trailer type buses that run on that route barely move...I'm sure a snail walking behind these buses would be cursing the driver to move over so that he can overtake us....I had absolutely no choice but take the bus...lest I decided to walk which well...I wasn't in the mood to after walking around the whole of Marathahalli....stepped in and I was just too late to realise that I had forgotten to get some change and was stuck with just 100 buck notes. Yes all of you...not just those from India, but those abroad do know how irritating it can be for a conductor/driver when you give him a huge note and expect change for a ride that costs you a measely 5% of the note...oh well...I was faced with my tormentor now and presented the 100Rs note and spoke my destination as gentle as I could. He gave me a big smile and handed me my ticket after writing 95 on the back of it and just walked onto the next person. Now I was confused...was I just presented with a new currency which was used only by people living in the buses of Bangalore or was that just an autograph?? I bumped into him again and asked him for my change...."Change illa saar" and then there was a lot kannada which just passed by my brain as though they were directed to the person walking on the other side of the road....I rougly figured out that he would give me the change when I got off at my stop.

A little info to all those people reading this from countries in Europe and America...buses are pretty busy in India and when I mean busy, it doesn't just mean we have to stand and we don't get a seat to sit down, I also mean most of the people are either hanging on their arms outside the bus or defying every single law of gravity by actually hovering in air all thanks to the N number of people pushing them from behind. This was exactly how this bus was....I was stuck inside this bus and was just praying I would get home in one piece....sigh...I stood there wondering where all these guys were headed to late in the night at 10pm....guess they were wondering the same about me....my destination arrived and jumped off the bus and started walking as fast as I could away from the bus...trust me I had had enough!

Reached home and decided to lie down and watch a movie and that's when i put my hand in my pocket to find the ticket with the magic number '95'....oh CRAP!!!!! yep....i had lost 95 bucks :( I had spent 100 bucks for a lousy bus ride...the bloody ricks charge just 50 which again is pretty overprized as the ride is generally just 28!

Sigh...guess that's life and for one thing, I've learned my lesson....if a bus has the number 201 on it, I'm not stepping in again!!!